More than 400 seventh graders at Ray Middle School sat in silence on the gymnasium floor on Friday morning as physical education teacher Doug Jackson spoke about his best friend’s death by suicide.“You could fill the Dome with people and he would have been the last person you would have expected to do this,” Jackson told the students. Rob Kavovit took his own life while suffering from silent depression. He was 45. Jackson and Kavovit played lacrosse together in high school and at Syracuse University, including being part of the 1995 National Championship team.
After Kavovit’s death, his family went to work to spread the message that there needs to be more open dialogue around depression and mental health matters. They launched the 15 for Life Foundation with the mission to “shed the shame around needing help and normalizing the conversation around mental health by creating awareness so that our loss may help others.”
Jackson travels around the country to share Kavovit’s story and to talk about his own struggles with mental health. This is the second year Jackson has shared this important message with Ray students during Mental Health Awareness Month.
Jackson said he was dealing with mental health issues at the time of Kavovit’s death.
“I was struggling at the same exact time that my best friend was and I didn’t know it,” Jackson said. “I was too embarrassed to speak up.”
Jackson said he is not embarrassed anymore and he wants to normalize having conversations around depression, suicide and mental health issues.
“Silence is not saving lives,” he told the students. “I’m not going to stay silent anymore.”
Jackson encouraged the students to speak up about how they feel and to find someone to go to when they are struggling.
He noted that research states that 20 percent of teens will experience depression before they reach adulthood.
“That’s 95 of you in this room,” he said. “That should make you feel a little less alone.”
He also encouraged students to talk to their parents but to remember that their parents are humans too and they are not always going to have the perfect thing to say.
After the presentation, students went back to their classrooms to dig deeper into the message. One of the things they were asked to think about is who they could reach out to if they needed help. Jackson challenged them to list five people.
“Find someone who you can go to when you are struggling and when you see a kid struggling, speak up,” he said.
The 15 for Life Foundation wants to normalize the conversation around mental health matters.
“With this movement, we hope to normalize the conversation that can save the lives of many people suffering like Rob did, including athletes and young people by simply raising awareness,” according to their website. “It’s very likely you know someone who suffers this type of mental illness. Ask the hard questions, learn the signs of depression as it has many faces.”
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